I think the only genre synonymous with the early 80's that can possibly compete with my love of sex comedies would be slasher flicks. For kids in my generation, horror movies took on an almost epic quality when they were discussed at school. There were always a few kids with parents either liberal or oblivious enough to let them rent whatever came out, regardless of content, so most of us probably heard of Freddy Krueger for the first time through our peers. Back then, this kind of stuff was forbidden for little kids, it was all built up to a point that these movies seemed pretty damn scary. I mean, when was the last time a movie scared you the way they did when you were a kid?
Video stores back then always had movies you'd never heard of, usually in boxes with the craziest cover art that was usually better than the movie inside. Sure, you'd always see the first few Friday the 13ths and Nightmare on Elm Streets when they were around, but it was the lesser-known stuff that was always scarier and more exciting. With that said, in no particular order, here's the top six (I couldn't decide on just five) slasher flicks from the early 80s that are NOT part of a major franchise.
1) The Burning
Really just another in the long line of "Friday the 13th" rip-offs set in a summer camp, this also happens to be one of (if not the) best. It all starts off with the creepy camp custodian being set on fire by a bunch of teenagers in a prank gone wrong, who spends a few years in a burn ward and comes back for revenge. As an aside for people that aren't quite familiar with the slasher formula, there's ALWAYS a prank that goes wrong with somebody coming back for revenge. If there isn't a flashback or a prologue followed by "five years later", you're probably not in a slasher flick. Anyway, the burned-up guy gets out of the hospital and promptly kills a really nice hooker for no discernible reason other than to say "Hey, we got Tom Savini doing the effects in this movie!" From there, he goes to the summer camp and starts killing kids as is usually the case in these movies. The difference being that THIS movie has George Costanza. With hair.
"George is getting upset!"
Don't worry, though, because George doesn't get killed and he has a few funny lines.
As I've mentioned, Tom Savini did the effects for this movie after turning down "Friday the 13th: Part 2". The movie was produced by Harvey and Bob Weinstein, who went on to found Miramax and then the Weinstein Company in the future. We also have George. Obviously there was a bit of talent put into this thing and it shows. Really, all you're looking for in a slasher flick are some good gore gags (Savini's the tops for that), some laughs, a few boobs and some good set pieces. "The Burning" has all of that in spades. There's a really crazy scene involving a raft, there's a good atmosphere throughout and you're not spending the running time of the flick hating the kids and wanting them to get offed. Granted, it's far from an original entry in the genre, but sometimes you'd rather just have a good take on the common elements.
2) Pieces
"Pieces" concerns a killer murdering women on a college campus with a chainsaw. Sounds awesome already, right? Well, this isn't your typical slasher flick. In fact, it's just about the most batshit insane and over-the-top movie you'll ever see. NOTHING in this movie makes any sense. When the killer goes after a girl in a swimming pool, he grabs one of those little nets on a pole and puts it over her head while she stays completely immobile and weakly screams. There's a little dorky guy who is somehow the biggest player on campus and is given a key role in the police investigation, headed up by a female tennis pro that moonlights as a cop. When the female cop is patrolling the campus at night, she's attacked by an Asian man doing the wackiest kung fu you've ever seen until he's knocked out. Turns out he's the campus karate instructor and his excuse for randomly attacking a woman is "Must've had some bad chop suey!"
In one of the best scenes, the female cop discovers the dead body of a student and expresses the rage she feels toward the killer.
You know how movies like this might have one big scene and the rest are just padding? Well, the whole movie is that ridiculous. Even the murder scenes are absolutely crazy, with some of the most violent kills you've ever seen. Apparently the makers of this film decided that makeup effects were too expensive, so they just got a bunch of dead pigs and used chainsaws on them. So yeah, this movie is the best.
3) The House on Sorority Row
This is kind of a dark horse choice because I think I'm one of the few people that enjoys it as much as I do. Once again, we have something bad happening in the past that plays out in the present. Only this time we have TWO bad things in the past: one in the distant past, one that happens while the movie plays out. Without ruining too much of the plotline, a bunch of sorority girls accidentally kill the old lady that I guess is some kind of a live-in chaperone and they start getting picked off. What I really love about this movie is that it actually builds tension rather than relying on cheap gore gags (although the head in the toilet is pretty crazy). Some of the girls are really adamant about keeping the whole thing a secret which causes a hell of a lot of tension between all of them. Who the killer is stays a mystery throughout and is only revealed until the last ten minutes or so. From there, we get what I think is one of the best showdowns in slasher movie history.
This was recently remade as "Sorority Row", only it has absolutely nothing to do with the original. This is one of the most underrated slasher flicks around, give it a go.
4) Sleepaway Camp
I think this movie has become legendary over the years, and all for one reason: that fucking ending! I once heard somebody say about this movie "Never has there been a film that was so redeemed by an ending", and I think that's totally true. Sure, we just have another summer camp slasher flick. That said, I also think this movie scared the hell out of me more than almost any other when I was a kid. There's a certain vibe that exists in low budget horror movies from the late 70's and early 80's, kind of a sleaziness that seems impossible to capture now. When you watch a modern horror movie, the entire cast looks beautiful. The camerawork is beautiful. The SOUND EDITING is beautiful. There's just a slickness to everything that takes you out of the whole thing completely. With something like "Sleepaway Camp", the cast looks like a bunch of normal people. The acting is pretty bad. The sets are pretty dingy. The camerawork consists of "stand there and shoot this" and even the music is cheap and silly. Surprisingly, that all adds up to give an atmosphere to these movies that just makes you want to take a shower afterward. I find that makes a movie scarier.
When I was a kid, this was REALLY scary. I remember finding the whole thing to be really off-putting and sleazy, but it wasn't bad enough for me to leave the room or anything. Then, the ending. Holy crap, that image was burned into my brain for years and still freaks me out to this day! You've got to love a movie that, despite all its flaws, can still manage to have a really deep effect on you to that level.
5) My Bloody Valentine
I don't consider this a "franchise" film since it's been remade, plus I feel obligated to put this in as somebody that lives in Eastern Canada. Here's the reasons I love this movie:
1) It was shot in Sydney Mines, Nova Scotia and everyone drinks Moosehead beer throughout.
2) It's set in a mine. It's claustrophobic as hell and makes for a nice change from the usual summer camps and college campuses these movies are usually set in.
3) The kills (thanks to the new uncut DVD that just came out) are some of the craziest you'll see in the genre.
4) The fat guy is a player! Seriously, there's a big fat guy with a big fat mustache and glasses who manages to hook up with one of the best-looking women in the group. The alternate reality this movie is set in sounds awesome for fat guys.
5) The characters all look and act, for the most part, like real people. Any time you watch a movie like this and think "No, don't kill THAT guy!", you know it's a good one.
Supposedly this is Quentin Tarantino's favorite slasher flick, and I think there's a good reason for that. It's a really fun and unique entry in the genre.
6) The Slumber Party Massacre
This movie's just a barrel of fun. It's just some guy going after nubile young women with a big drill (get it??), but it's also very funny and entertaining the whole way through. The girls are all really cute, the guys in it are all morons and it was written and directed by a couple of feminists. I'm not sure what it all means, but when you get a bunch of girls checking out the murdered pizza guy and saying "He's cold." "Is the pizza?", you know you're in for something you probably shouldn't be reading too much into. There's no sleaziness to this movie for the most part, it's mostly just a funny rollercoaster of a movie that goes great with some friends and a few beers.
There are two sequels to SPM, both of which are also pretty fun. Slumber Party Massacre II concerns the sister of the first movie's main character (played by the chick from "Wings") who plays in a really crappy band and sees her friends get stalked by an evil Elvis impersonator who uses a guitar drill on his victims. I swear, check this thing out:
The third movie is basically just a copy of the first one with different characters. Still, you could do worse.
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